Semi-stressed milk

I actually wrote it down on my shopping list – 4 pints of semi stressed milk.

See, growing up as a natural three toed sloth (moves slowly and leaves shit everywhere it goes….) left me in prime position to have a really messy house when I grew up.

Marrying a four toed sloth (male, larger, more mess…) just created the environment that would make most peoples bad house days look like perfect house and garden.

Add two kids, whose tidy genes are missing in their gene sequencing – and you have a recipe for serious mess.

Then one day the cleaner actually threatened to quit.

It was that bad.  Seriously.  And of course I don’t really have many photos to prove it (I mean who on earth takes photos of their house looking messy) – except the one photo that I found of my kids playroom on an old discarded mobile phone…

erm.

Well.  embarrassing huh.  The great thing about this room is that I could shut the door on it.  With some effort and digging mind you.

and the rest of the house was pretty awesome too.  I mean we could store 6 weeks of laundry in our house – and I’m not talking in wardrobes or chests of drawers either.

I know because our washing machine broke and that is how long it took to deplete the supply of clothes from the spare room (3 weeks), the airing cupboard (1 week), the hallway (a good couple of days), the lounge room (1 week and all the socks) and the various little piles of clothes that got found and excavated during the great washing machine breakdown.

I won’t mention the number of plates and mugs that we could use before we would run out.  Or the penicillin cultures inside the house that were competing in size with the natural woodlands outside our house.

My mates would probably wear out their fingers typing, if I were to ask them to contribute their mess memories of our house to this blog (do you think I should ask them?)

And the most embarrassing thing about my mess – well…the thing that I do, that gets me paid during those daylight hours – is to help businesses, factories and hospitals to stay clutter free and keep their businesses really lean.

Have you recovered from the choking yet?  Seriously.  Hello Mrs Kettle!  Mrs Pot speaking!

So armed to the teeth with business models, tools and techniques I set to figuring out how to sort out my mess.  Well, not quite the truth….

First I went to Amazon.  Could I find a book for true sloths to turn their houses around in a few easy steps?  Nope.  Could I find a book that just told me in a few easy words (I have the attention span of a bumblebee on speed) and a few quick steps how to sort out my mess?  Nope.

Bugger that I thought.   So I decided to take what I do at work and figure out how to use it in the home.

And bugger me, you know what – it worked!  There were some classic “oops….don’t do that again” type moments, also some true Mastercard moments – you know the priceless ones where the answer smacks you round the head like a very obvious piece of four by two.

So I thought I’d share a little bit of what it has been like.  A little bit of a behind the scenes if you will.  Bits that probably won’t be in the book……

I hope you enjoy the journey.  It has been fun.  There is a book now – that’ll be ready to download or buy in a couple of weeks.  And for those of you that enjoy a good looking nice read – it’s like Mr Men for ease of read crossed with House and Garden for good looks.

Over the next couple of weeks I’m going to dig back into the archives of time…..and pick out some of the road-trip……just don’t laugh….too much.

Love and hugs

Rach